A Mending Shift

“Each of us can reflect God’s glory by being who we are without apology.”

Pause. Did you read that? I mean, did you really read that? As Dave, a good friend of mine, says, Mufasa…read it again. (I’ll wait as you do).

“Each of us can reflect God’s glory by being who we are without apology.”

Allow those words to sink into your spirit, for buried within them lies the key to experiencing the freedom that longs to be birthed and encapsulate your entire being. A life-provoking freedom that can only be found by trusting, embracing and expressing who God is creating you to be in the present moment—shit and beauty, fully—without pretense or apology, with infant-like trust.

Being who you are without apology. Not who you should you be. Or ought to be. Or expected to be. Or want to be. Not who your parents want you to be. Or your friends. Or your spouse. Or—now hang on here!—even who you think God wants you to be. Not trying to be like your parents, or friends, or spouse, or __________ (fill in the blank). But…

Who. You. Are.

Right here, right now, in this present moment. Not who you were yesterday…three months ago…five years ago…twenty years ago. Not who you think, want, desire to be tomorrow…three months from now…five years from now…or in two decades. But…

Who. You. Are. Today.

Yet there is nothing more attractive and frightening, is there? There are few things in life we want and yet frighten us more than fully being who we are. As one who has gone on my personal here-I-am-without-apology journey (more on that later, stay tuned) I have experienced something. To some people your here-I-am-ness is beautiful, to others it is bitter. To some it carries with it a scent of fear and death, to others one of life and freedom. Some people (even those closest to you) will not like your here-I-am stance, while others will love it. We all inherently know that there will be a cost in us saying, “Here I am, without apology”. We also know there will be a reward. The point then becomes less “What will others say or do?” and more “Am I being faithful to and trusting the one who is forming me?”

We are also both terribly drawn to and pleasantly frightened by those who have found the courage to be who they are, without apology. Being around someone like that is terrifying because it casts sunlight onto all of our should-be-why-am-I-not insecurities we’ve worked so hard to mask and cover up. We are living in the darkness of our own shame and hiddenness, and their light repels us. But in the same breath, we are also attracted to those who have found the freedom to be who they are without apology because they project a freedom and peace that we crave in the deepest parts of our being. Our spirit longs to be set free and fly like theirs.

Why? Let’s connect some dots.

God said to Moses, I Am. Not I was. Not I am going to be. But I Am. (Do you sense the light bulb warming up?) Could it be that this is why each of us can reflect God’s glory by being who we are? By being who I am? Could this be why when we trust, embrace and express who God is creating us to be in the present moment, fully, without pretense or apology, with infant-like trust, we find a divinely-orchestrated sense of freedom, peace and joy? Could this partly be why Jesus—who was I Am in human form—said, “My yoke is easy and my burden is light.”?

We were created to live life as “here I am”, not “who I was” or “who I should, ought, need to be”. And when we do, we not only experience the peace, freedom and joy we were designed to live in, but we also reflect God’s glory.

You know what else it does? It allows us to accept, love and embrace others as they are. Not as they were. Not as we expect them to be. But simply as they are. Why? Because Jesus was pretty smart. He said,

“Love you neighbor as you love yourself.”

If you have the courage to love yourself as you are, it teaches and frees you to love others as they are. To love them without pretense or expectation, but simply because they are made in God’s image to reflect God’s glory, as are you and I. And perhaps when they are loved by you as they are because you love yourself as you are, it slowly gives them the courage and freedom to go and do likewise. And the cycle of loving-the-other-as-yourself begins to grow…much like yeast in dough and a tiny mustard seed.

But it begins with you. It begins with me. Learning to have the courage—in and through Jesus—to stand and proudly say, without shame or apology:

Here I am.

(A special thank you to Hillary McFarland who found the courage to say “Here I Am” when writing the book, Quivering Daughters, where I read the phrase, “Each of us can reflect God’s glory by being who we are without apology” and inspired this post. Thank you, Hillary).

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This entry was posted by Jeromy Johnson on Monday, May 9th, 2011 at 6:22 am and is filed under blessing, forgiveness, freedom, God, grace, love, transformation. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.